Short of Breath for You Read online

  “Madison Davies,” I said, unable to keep myself from grinning.

  “The Madison? The one from college?” Ethan asked. He knew how much I had liked Maddie back in the day.

  “Yes,” I said, feeling good right down to my toes. Coach could make me skate a thousand laps and shoot a million goals and I wouldn’t even notice. I was on cloud nine.

  “Did you fuck her?” Hunter demanded.

  “I sure did,” I told him and he held up his hand to high five.

  “Dylan, you dog, you.” Hunter did a Gretzky pump. “You’ve been wanting to get in her pants for years, right? Finally. Congrats, man. Another notch for the old belt, huh?”

  I frowned and pulled out my shoulder pads.

  “It’s not like that, Hunter. I really like her. I’m going to call her. I want to see her again.”

  Hunter raised his eyebrows nearly to his hairline.

  “Seriously?”

  “Yeah, man. I think she might be…”

  “What?” Ethan asked, narrowing his eyes at me.

  “You know… the one.”

  “Are you kidding me?”

  Hunter came over and put his hand on my forehead as if checking for a fever.

  “No, I’m not kidding,” I said, pushing his hand away. “Fuck off. I’m serious. I really like her.”

  “Whoa,” Ethan said. “I’ve haven’t heard you talk like this since…”

  “College?” I said, giving him a look.

  “Yeah,” he said, blinking in realization. “You really like her?”

  “Yeah, man. I really do.”

  “Cool,” Ethan said, slapping my back. “I’m happy for you, man. Me? I’m never falling in love. I swear.”

  He raised his hand as if he were being sworn in in court.

  “You just wait,” I promised him. “You wait till the right girl comes along. You’ll fall as hard as any of the rest of us.”

  *****

  “Madison blocked me,” I told Hunter and Ethan that night at The Jaded Glass, our favourite place to go for drinks. I took a long pull on my beer and felt miserable.

  “The Madison you fucked last night and were all lovey-dovey about this morning?” Hunter asked. “That Madison?”

  “Yes, that Madison,” I said, irritated that he was describing it that way but he was mostly right, I supposed.

  “When I went to call her, I couldn’t.”

  “Maybe she blocked you by mistake?” Ethan suggested.

  “How do you mistakenly block the number of the guy that you just had sex with?” Hunter asked Ethan, shaking his head. “Usually girls are texting you every three seconds after you fuck them, Dylan. How’d you manage to screw it up with the one girl you actually wanted to call back?”

  I had no idea.

  She had to have done it on purpose.

  But why?

  Had she only wanted someone to take her virginity and us being locked in there together was the perfect way to get rid of her V-card? It hadn’t felt like a one-night stand to me. But all my memories seemed suspect now. I didn’t know what to think.

  “I don’t know,” I said, running my fingers through my hair and then putting my hand to my forehead. I tried to remember what I might have done. “Everything was great. She walked me to the dressing room. I went in. And then we were talking…”

  “Wait. Which dressing room were we in?” Ethan demanded.

  “Number six, I think,” I told him.

  “So we’re talking about the dressing room where you can hear everything anyone says when you’re standing in the hallway because of the fucked up acoustics?” Ethan asked, shaking his head. “That dressing room?”

  “Oh shit,” I said. “She probably heard what Hunter said about her being a notch in my belt.”

  “But what about all the lovey-dovey stuff you said after that?”

  “She probably ran off as soon as she heard she was just a conquest,” Ethan said, glaring at Hunter. “You and your mouth, Hunter.”

  “This is bad,” I said. “She told me the reason she turned me down all those years ago was because she thought that I was only asking her to go out with me because of a bet.”

  “Oh no,” Ethan said, wincing. “And now she heard Hunter talking like that’s all it was.”

  “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” I said. “What am I going to do?”

  “You have to talk to her.” Ethan advised.

  “She blocked me, remember?”

  “So go to her place.”

  “I don’t know where her place is.”

  “Let’s google her,” Hunter said, pulling out his phone. A moment later he scowled at the offending device. “None of her social media profiles have any information about her physical whereabouts.”

  “Shit,” I said, feeling like I was going to freak. “I’ve lost her.”

  “No. Don’t worry, Dylan. I know a girl who can find that information,” Ethan said.

  “You know a girl?” Hunter said, giving Ethan a weirded-out look. “That sounds sketchy as fuck, man.”

  “She’s a white hat hacker or something like that. She owes me a favour.”

  “Fine,” I said. “But once I find out where she lives, what am I supposed to do?”

  “How about a grand gesture?” Hunter suggested.

  “I don’t think she’s the kind of woman to appreciate a grand gesture. It would just come off as false,” Ethan said.

  “You’re right,” I said, then I snapped my fingers as an idea came to me. “I’ve got it. Can you call your hacker, Ethan, and see if she can find out Maddie’s address?”

  “On it,” Ethan said, pulling out his phone.

  “Where are you going?” Hunter asked.

  “To see if the arena gift shop is still open,” I said, ignoring their confused expressions. “I need to buy a zamboni.”

  Their laughter followed me as I headed out of the bar as quickly as I could.

  I had an idea. I only prayed that this hacker could get Maddie’s info.

  And that Madison would listen to me when I finally found her.

  *****

  An hour later, I knocked on her door and waited. A minute later, Maddie opened it and stared at me. She soon unfroze and started to close the door again.

  Were her eyes red? Had she been crying? Was I the cause of her pain? God damn it, of course I was. I was an imbecile. But I was going to fix this. I had to.

  “No, wait,” I said, putting my hand on the door and preventing her from closing it completely. “I really need to talk to you, Maddie.”

  “Don’t call me that,” she snapped.

  “I’m sorry,” I said, searching her eyes. “I’m an idiot. And I’m so sorry I hurt you, Madison. But if you’ll just let me in for a minute. If you’ll just hear me out. I promise, I’ll make it up to you. Every fucking day, Madison. Please, just… can I talk to you for a minute?”

  “You didn’t hurt me,” she said, and her face closed off, looking as cold as it had the times she had shut me down in college. And I got that sucker punch feeling in my stomach again. Because I was losing.

  But this was more important than any game I had ever played.

  “Then you won’t mind letting me in? I just want to talk,” I said, matching her neutral tone.

  “Sure,” she said, as if she was going to prove that she didn’t care about me at all. “You have a couple minutes. Then I have to go.”

  I walked into the apartment, gathering my thoughts. I had only once chance to fix what I’d screwed up. And I was terribly nervous that I was going to fuck it up again.

  When I looked up at Madison, though, my eyes went wide. She’d been behind the door before so I hadn’t been able to get a look at her.

  Damn, the woman was dressed to kill. She was probably going out to take her mind off of me and how I’d hurt her. She was wearing a red dress that showed enough cleavage a man could get lost in there and not come out for days. The damn dress was skin tight and you could see every single curve. I re
membered every inch of her and it made me furious that she was going out to let other guys look at that gorgeous body.

  Maddie got a tiny smile of satisfaction on her face as if she knew that she’d made an impression on me. Lord, I had never seen such a sexy woman. I ached for her. But I knew I would never get to touch her again if I didn’t get this right.

  I reached into my pocket and pulled out a tiny toy zamboni that I had bought at the arena gift shop a few minutes ago.

  “What the fuck, Dylan?” She frowned at me, her eyes hurt, all trace of the coldness gone.

  “Look, do you know how a zamboni works?” I asked, feeling a little bit desperate at this point and pretty sure she wouldn’t forgive me. But I had to try anyway. The most satisfying hockey games are the ones that you have to fight and bleed and work at to win. I knew this would be no different.

  This was a pull-the-goalie-and-put-six-guys-on-the-ice last ditch attempt to win the game. It had to work.

  Madison

  “Do I know how a zamboni works?” I repeated, not sure I had heard him correctly. Fuck, why did he have to look so good? He wore a white T-shirt with a navy blue button down over top. He had rolled the sleeves up to his elbows and he had on matching navy cargo pants.

  His blue eyes looked even more crystal clear in contrast to the dark colour of his clothes. And they were troubled — filled with regret.

  But that was all an act. He wasn’t good. He was mean. My instincts about him had been right from the start.

  I was an idiot.

  “What do you want, Dylan?”

  “A lot of people don’t know this,” he said, sounding nervous. “But the zamboni actually shaves the ice first and then melts it in order to clean it.”

  I stared at him. Then my eyes dropped down to the zamboni he was holding out.

  “So? Sounds like it just hides what’s scratched and roughed up and cut to shreds.”

  “No, that’s just it,” he said, stepping forward. “It doesn’t just hide what’s wrong with the ice. It fixes it. Makes it whole and perfect again.”

  I managed to control myself but he met my eyes and I knew that he knew that I was ready to cry. He took my hand and put the zamboni in it.

  “And I know you think I’m a terrible guy but you only heard half the conversation.”

  I frowned.

  “After you heard Hunter say that you were just another notch in my belt, you must have left and missed what I said after.”

  “What did you say?” I said, not meeting his eyes but looking down at the toy in my palm.

  “I told him it wasn’t like that. That I really liked you. That I thought that maybe you were the one.”

  My head shot up. He was nodding. I cupped both hands around the cute little zamboni, studying it intently.

  “And I meant it,” he said, putting his big hands around mine and the zamboni.

  “You…”

  “I’m falling for you, Madison. And I really need you to give me one more chance. Because it’s my heart that’s scratched and roughed up and cut to shreds. But if you don’t give me a shot, then…”

  He trailed off, maybe losing the metaphor. Or maybe picturing what it would be like if I didn’t give him a chance. His face was so sad and he was gazing at me with such desperate hope that I couldn’t keep him in suspense any longer.

  “You had me at zamboni, Dylan.”

  Dylan’s eyes lit up and he pulled me into a crazy tight hug.

  “I’m falling for you too,” I whispered in his ear.

  Then I put my hand around his neck and pulled him down to me, kissing him until we both forgot how scratched and rough and cut to shreds our hearts were. Until the zamboni that was us smoothed things out and made us whole and perfect again.

  Epilogue

  Madison

  A few weeks later…

  I sat at the table in The Jaded Glass and smiled as Dylan put his arm around my shoulders, pulling me snug against him, while we listened to Hunter go on and on about some fridge he had bought and got two hundred dollars off because he haggled with the manager of the store.

  Ethan was there too with his flavour of the week chick.

  Dylan played with my hair but I batted his hand away. My hair was much shorter than when we had met because I had let my natural hair colour grow out to shoulder length and then cut off the blonde.

  I loved having my real hair colour back. Dylan said that he had always worshipped my red hair and he was so glad I’d gone back to it.

  I think I was glad too because I was working on being my true self more. I was trying hard to be authentic and allowing other people that gift as well.

  I had realized that it was me who was keeping Dylan and I apart from the beginning. Because I had some story in my head about who he was and who I was.

  So now I try to be myself and let others be themselves, no matter their appearance or their station in life.

  It was a much better way to relate to people and I was a lot happier. Of course, that might have something to do with my amazing boyfriend, too.

  Dylan

  I frowned as a woman approached our table looking pissed. Oh no. Which one of these guys had loved and left this woman? The last thing I wanted was drama tonight. Our team had got into the playoffs. And Maddie had nailed her latest project at work, ensuring herself a promotion. It was Friday night and we were celebrating.

  I glared at the other two men but Hunter lifted his hands in surrender.

  Ethan, on the other hand, was looking worried as she came up to the table.

  “Wright? Can I talk to you?”

  “Right now, Evans? Can’t you see I’m busy,” Ethan said.

  She checked out the woman sitting next to Ethan and lifted one eyebrow.

  “I’m sure you are. But this is important. It’ll just take five minutes.”

  Maddie and I exchanged glances as Ethan got up and went to talk to the woman.

  Hunter gave me a look that said who the fuck is that?

  I shrugged. I hoped it wasn’t another stalker. Ethan had had enough of those. Hopefully he wasn’t being abducted as we waited for him to come back.

  But he returned in about ten minutes and the party continued. He didn’t say anything about this Evans woman who had addressed him as if she knew him. And neither of us wanted to press him in front of Madison and the woman he’d brought.

  I tried to forget about it. It was probably nothing.

  Maddie was tucked into me and I had a beer in my hand, friends around me, and good music playing. It was time to relax and enjoy, not worry.

  “Dylan?” Maddie said. “Want to dance?”

  A sweet, slow song was playing and we got up. She put her arms around my neck and I put my hands on her hips. We swayed to the music.

  “I can’t wait till we get back to your apartment and we can do this horizontally,” I whispered in her ear, feeling a shiver go through her.

  “You know what, Dylan?” She said, gazing up into my eyes. “I think I love you.”

  I lifted my eyebrows.

  “You think? Well, I know I love you, Madison. And I always will.”

  Book 2 in the Curves for the Hockey Player Series is the story about Ethan and Kat.

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  Brooke Baker

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